Running Into Oblivion

Sometimes, we need to push ourselves. The push could be just a little jerk or it could be so violent the we end up putting all our efforts to make us move, move. Move. Get going! Go, start running. What the hell are you still doing here? What more incentive you need to start running than to know that staying in this place is only going to bring you more darkness and eventually you'll end up getting sucked up into this little limbo that's called miracles. Cause believe me, the miracle start to happen once you decide you get hold of yourself. We are accustomed to wait for good things to happen to us. Why can't be it just other way round, huh? Why can't we happen to good things? Who the hell are they to decide when to happen to us and when not? Why can't i take hold of my happiness in my hand? Cause you know what? its hard. Its so fucking hard to get hold of that one thing that defines perfect life. Happiness. We all need it and we all forget it that it exists within us behind all those curtains that makes us imagine it to be invisible. We search for it everywhere. In people, in movies, in distractions, in hangouts beside oceans at middle of the night, in lover's eyes, in his words, in his silent indirect confession of feelings, in silence between two eyes, in cakes, in music, at cleaning our rooms, at washing our soul with religion, at so many things but we forget to look for it within ourselves. All we need to do is stand up in front of the mirror and look at the reflection. That's us, that's me. 22. Bold. Young and pretty. I might never be like this again. Never. These hands might start to wrinkle up and my temples starts to wither. Do i need to wait for that time to come to realize that i should have loved myself now? At this moment when i had everything and yet i was searching for it everywhere but myself?

I don't know what i wrote above. But this is what i wanted to write and i did.